Date Gone Bad: A Submission by Allison

Hello there fellow post-grads. I miss you all. Its been far too long since I've been to Boston- I think the last time I traveled north was Homecoming actually-yikes. Life has been treating me well here in NYC, as it was so generously pointed out by Miz Jackie B. I just want to say, its not all fun and games down here, BUT sometimes, sometimes it is.
The story I'm about to tell you happened to me last Thursday.I had met this kid, lets call him David (because that is his real name) at a Bar the previous weekend in the Hamptons. I don't really remember meeting David exactly, but I do remember that he was a Ginger (this is important). David for some reason was quite enamored with me- and wanted to meet me in the City for drinks. At this point I was already quite suspicious by this fellow, since no one should like me THAT much when I'm wasted. But, it had been awhile since I'd been on a date- and my reasoning to go was summed up by: "Whatever, at least I'll get a free drink or two." Little did I know, my drink consumption would absolutely not stop at two.
David had made arrangements to meet at a champagne bar around 9pm that night. This was his first mistake. There was absolutely NO WAY I was going to this date sober - I'm pretty sure that I lied to him about a lot of shit when I first met him, I needed to keep up an aloof aura. And there was NO WAY that I would make it all the way to 9pm without getting semi-blackout/very inappropriate.
Also, NYC absolutely still partakes in thirsty thursday, and shit gets quite aggressive. So my roomates were pregaming to go out as well. I'd say before I left to meet up with David I had two mixed drinks and two (maybe 3) shots.
Let me reiterate, this champagne bar we were meeting at was extremely, small and low-key, basically a place made for nice, romantic dates for nice romantic people. I think you can see where this is going.
Anyways, by the time I arrived (I was pretty late). David, this sweet yet unassuming boy, had already ordered two tequila shots for us. Mistake #2
Much to my surprise, David actually turned out to be not so bad. I don't know if I didn't want to be the only drunk person in the bar- but somehow I pressured this guy to get just as drunk as I was. I'd like to say that I could recount everything that followed, and the conversations we had (they were weird) I'm sure there is some A+ blog material.
I came-to making out with David in the middle of the bar. This nice bar, where NO ONE else was drunk, nonetheless mackin it with some semi-stranger. I must've realized this was inappropriate (talking about myself in 3rd person makes sense, since I wasn't really 'me' at this point).So I excused myself to go to the bathroom. I didn't go to the bathroom.
I walked out of the restaurant, hopped in a cab and left Ginger David.
Obviously, he caught on to me. Here are the following texts I received:
*PLEASE NOTE- I sent him my baby picture earlier in this conversation. I don't know why. *

As you can see I told him to come to my apartment, and when he did I promptly passed the fuck out. But what is really the most surprising out of this whole affair is that he wanted to hang out with me again. Its been precisely a week now and I have not heard from Ginger David. But if he does text me again, should I agree to see him again? Please comment and let me know what you think.

TFJ Bitches.

Wait... life exists after a sorority?

Being a broke college grad is hard. Especially if you were in a sorority. Cracked out house mom's don't make you tacos on tuesday in the real world, the corporate world doesn't understand why the front row of any picture NEEDS to squat down, and people still fucking ask you what TFJ means (... wait do I even remember?). Crafts are designated for nanas, and getting blacked out Tuesday through Saturday means you're now an alcoholic (...or Allison Woerner). Since we're all in different places right now and it's hard to always meet up, I've taken my bitchy social media skills to the next level and created After Tau Problems. Think of it as your new Blackboard e-mail thread, and you just opened crack slipper part deux. I'll make sure to throw in random posts about how we still can't find Elise Perron's purse from cocktail 8 years ago, or that the kitchen was disgusting last night and poor Fall PreTENd had to clean it up. Everyone who I assign access to will be able to post from their user name, and others can see who wrote each post. Feel free to bitch, post funny shit, drunk blog, update us on real life accomplishments etc. All shenanigans are welcome.

disclaimer: Katie Georgia- this does not mean you can post on here five times a day asking people to hang out or meet you in Boston. Love you bitch, but don't make me learn how to block someone. xoxo #katieproblems.